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🌑 ARC Review – We Call Them Witches by India-Rose Bower
📅 Release date: 22 Jan 2026
⭐️ 1/5 stars
Pre-order from Amazon (Hardcover)
Pre-order from Amazon (Kindle Edition)

Synopsis

Most people have been devoured by the eldritch creatures, but Sara and her family have been fighting for survival, armed with their knowledge of folklore and pagan rituals – the only weapon that seems to work against these monsters.

And then a young woman, Parsley, comes out of nowhere into Sara’s life. Found in their garden, they have no idea where she is from.

Sara and Parsley begin to fall in love, but disaster strikes when Sara’s brother Noah is taken by the creatures.
They set out to find him, across a landscape of merciless terror, haunted by death.

But can Parsley truly be trusted in a world where humanity is as scarse as humans themselves?

What I thought

This was my first ARC on NetGalley, and I had really high hopes for We Call Them Witches. A queer, folklore-infused horror story set in a post-apocalyptic Britain. The premise and intriguing book cover made me excited to dive in. Unfortunately, the book didn’t land for me, and I almost DNF’d around page 72.

The writing style was my first major hurdle. It felt overly stylised to the point of being disjointed, as if every “creative writing” technique was crammed onto every page. The result was a chaotic mix of clashing metaphors, confusing sentences, and bizarre analogies that didn’t quite fit the tone or theme. At times, it seemed like the story was trying so hard to be different that it forgot to be readable.

The narrative itself was scattered and difficult to follow, with irrelevant snippets and moments that felt inserted purely for shock or quirkiness, without any real payoff. The constant film references felt similarly out of place, more like filler than meaningful insight.

There were also odd, disconnected moments, like the line “I think about the vibrator again,” which popped up with no explanation or context anywhere else. I even double checked, but it’s the only time it’s referenced.

On top of that, the character building felt flat. I never really got to know the main character, Sara, well enough in my opinion, and the world building was weighed down by so much “fluff” that both the story and characters ended up feeling lifeless. At one point, I felt like Bastian in The Never Ending Story, desperately shouting at the book to give me more.

Lastly, the handling of pronouns and language often made sentences clunky and unclear rather than enhancing character dynamics.

Overall, reading this felt like walking through a crowd of people waiting for a train, when all I wanted was to catch the bus. To quote the book itself, it was full of “ranting tangents that lose track of themselves halfway through.” A line that perfectly captures how the journey of this book felt for me, constantly veering off track and losing focus just when it seemed ready to find its feet.

Sadly, this was not the experience I was hoping for.
Offbeat, meandering, and just not for me.

Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher for providing an ARC in exchange for an honest review. While this one didn’t quite work for me, I’m always grateful for the chance to explore new authors and perspectives.